Thursday, May 6, 2010

Okay, as I usually do with an introduction, I want to explain my thoughts behind this. Everything has influenced me to write this. It is originally my thought, speaking in the modern meaning of the word. That is: knowing that absolute originality is never possible, but rather it is a combination and resultant of ideas running through my head, that I read, heard, thought of over time. Of course, since it is my one, I am still building on it to make it a lot more concrete, but sometimes building upon ideas makes their foundations a lot more precarious than initially. Also, sometimes instability is a temptation for me, a taboo temptation, which more often than not, I, with blissful excitement linger towards.

Hope you guys get through it and comment. Cause otherwise it would have been pointless to post.

Thanks :)



Idea of Freedom, and Forgetting.

As I mentioned before, that it is plausible, for me, in this state of mind to believe that without the past, we would have a freely floating conscience which in turn, to be logical, describes the state of nothingness, and weightless being.

Hence, I came across a paradox in my thoughts: If the idea of freedom is letting go of all our bonds that tie us down or categorise us, does this not logically mean that we should ‘free’ ourselves from our past, as our past is the only unperturbed anchor that grounds us to reality and that forms our basis of Self. Would this consequently lead to forgetting the past since the only way to be free of something is by forgetting it ever had an impact on you? Will this not lead us astray? And encourages us to wipe clear the earth of human personality? Does it also mean that we will succumb to the ever-growing nature of non-self, non-conscience, and anti-being?

While forgetting the past, we move to juxtapose our current human existence; which is that of past influence, memory, remembering and feelings in regards to stimuli and behaviours learned through previous repetition. To speak in empirical correctness, we could possibly become the antithesis of our humanity, by setting ourselves free. Because isn’t humanity that of succumbing to natures virtues and even vices, as you cannot have one without the other? Is it not humanity to breathe the air of every possible combination Nature – the external world – may through at us? Ultimately, I believe freedom is a result given to the walking corpses of this soil in return for their undying loyalty to surrender everything to the hands of pseudo-hope. In more clear terms, freedom is the finish line, after a life-long battle and endeavour fuelled by false hope. This is just an egocentric human invention, because they want to believe there is some special goal, or bonus that they work towards that comes at the time of death. Hope is that which urges us to endeavour after an obliviously fallible freedom. Freedom, is not only to free yourself from the tyrannical and forceful bonds that clasp fetters on your every whim, but freedom - and more so absolutist freedom - is that of forgetting oneself, of giving up ones persona, ones tastes, ones liberties, ones past: giving up that original sense of hoping for a superficial freedom. Is this not conscience death then? So I suppose Death waiting for us at the end of that finish line represents freedom? Maybe even God himself represents freedom. The final grasp towards the omnipotent, the one which shall show you freedom; you see it, just before you cross that finish line. At that point, you realise you have forgotten everything, even forgotten that you have forgotten, you are Death himself, looking back at the past with resentful nostalgia; knowing, knowing whole heartedly, that you had freedom all wrong. That it was instead a lure by God himself! Who gave us false hope that freedom, would set us consciously free. No! But rather it sets us free of conscience! It’s his evil trickery. A falsely magnanimous entity, that due to unfathomable greed wants humanity to exist only as a temptation, a long fucking strip tease, that in the end is jaded and causes the self-annihilation of all His beings, willingly approaching death with arms wide open. While death himself drops a tear of envy, for the human condition; and one in regret of the ignorance humanity possesses to misinterpret the true meaning of freedom.

Though I understand, my dears, you may raise your hand in indignation! Believe that I am fooling myself with such absurd ideas because freedom is not the act of breaking the fetters of one’s identity, but rather, the act of breaking away bonds of social boundaries. But kindly consider this my obstinate dears: What would you be now without the environmental and social forces that so dexterously moulded you to your present form? Is it not that external, ever-consternating, ethereal wonder that we so modestly call Mother Nature? The be all and end all of our human existence! our human identity! Oh, and don’t let me stop the flow of thought there my dears. Would it not be necessary to, with mouth ajar, and the most clamorous intonations announce that without this external maternal caresses we receive through a timeless period of our so called ‘living’ we would not hold an identity, nor whim, nor thought. She is our crafter, the creator of our conscience. Thus, no my dear readers, freedom is not the casting away of social boundaries as you might imagine, but rather the casting away of one’s soul; oneself; falling with the vertigo to abyssal darkness.

To not confuse you on a level that is beyond redacting, I would like you to consider one more crucial point. The freedom we veraciously seek is in fact the omnipresent feeling of collapse. A collapse of the proportion spoken in physics: Falling towards a single point; collapsing, into the centre of society and environmental surroundings. The idea of succumbing to every force, every pressure, every possible altering of the human condition by its external virtues and vices is what we so commonly misinterpret by the word freedom. Or maybe, no, we don’t, but the word itself deserves to be corrected, its semantic meaning is outdated. Freedom is to succumb to our every experience, to our every thought, our every taste, virtue or vice: taboo or holy. To have no boundaries in the boundaries of social and environmental impact: to be beyond good or evil. This is true freedom. Because who is that ignorant to say that they know all social and environmental strata, and believe to break free of their ominous bonds? These bonds are not those created by man for man, they are instead universal, scientific and infinite – something we are yet to grasp. Like looking at the meaning of freedom from a converse lens.

Lastly, my readers, do not excuse yourselves as the complex creatures of Mother Nature, the one she solemnly nurtured and lifted above all else to crucify those that did not follow Your order of dwelling, Not Hers. Do no shun me from your thoughts just because I came to the logical conclusion of that which you yourselves did not dare take even an inch the length. Do not excuse your cowardice for common sense. For these are my beliefs, and these are my tastes, my past, and to give in to the false idea of freedom is to repudiate the very essence of my being and to announce Mother Nature nothing more than a fraud. This I cannot do. This I shall not. For I announce that she is still my maternal bosom, by succumbing to social strata and accepting my past. You may keep your freedom, and false hopes, your liberties; for to give up my Self for them world be murder.

That which you so ignorantly perceive as fetters, I so jovially accept as a looking glass into humanity itself.

5 comments:

  1. do keep writing..

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  2. you are incredible.

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  3. wow your thoughts seem so deep but not in the ritual obvious way .. talent!

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  4. Tash! best fucking compliment. thank you oh so very much!

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